* Rapscallion has quit IRC (Quit: fo shizzle ma nizzle" is a bastardization of "fo' sheezy mah neezy" which is a bastardization of "for sure mah nigga" which is a bastdardization of "I concur with you whole heartedly my African american brother)

hn, i need more batteries...

just talking music. i have BSS's "Anthem for a Seventeen Year Old" on a loop (always, always on a loop); gets me all teary-eyed. i always wanted to say that it was my favourite in the album (from "You Forgot It In People"). although, "Almost Crimes"--a brilliant hand-clapping, shoe-shuffling song in its own accord. brilliant album in general (ah, tha textures! the GLORIOUS textures!). too bad hardly knows the band in school. =_= and it's a superband from their hometown. *grumbles* i was in the mood to talk about BSS because of katsu's mention of emily hanes of Metric. i found it fitting that my fave songs in the BSS's album had her as vocals. heh.

I'll end this with a bit of a mention to AIR's new album. 'cause "Talkie Walkie" is just so yummy. and dreamy. and good.

by the way, this is a self-reminder to myself to get a nice haircut.

don't get me wrong, my hair still does genius things with its mad, natural flip-a-roo and chunky skillz. i think that is why i'd like to keep my hair longer. but since it's not at the same length, the longer back part of my hair is starting to look like a nasty interpretation of a mullet. it goes away if i comb it when it's still wet, but i am so low-maintenance that i even forget to do that. i even forget to put that nice-smelling hair product in it.

... no, i did not deliberately make that sound kinky.

i've been trekking over to ff.net kingdom, only to find myself disappointed again. chaotic and meaningless most of them were, you can gather. if they want to be self-indulgent in writing, at least do it with some wit.

or with some plot. preferably both.

good fanfics, however BS'ed their deliberate presentation are, can still co-exist with those qualities. that is what makes them good.

(whatever, i had FLCL for an example. and a lot of people agree with me that is was truly the most brilliant of its kind.)

geez, i'm NOT snotty, just honest. brutally, if needed be. i'm tired of skirting around truths like before. (but it doesn't mean i won't stay diplomatic, it would be stupid of me to.) the phrase "if you want something done right, do it yourself" drones on in the back of my conscience way too many times as i would like, and i'm tempted to heed. i have perfectly good plots tucked up there somewhere, but i am wary of where and how to start, in frightful aversion of doing the same butchery as some of the loathesome, unmentionable authours i've come across in the past.

i do not want to be the same as them. unfortunately, i have to try, try, try, and do. i'd be eating my words if i don't go through with what i would like to do. i should do it as an appreciation to those who HAVE written wonderful stories and bettered their craft for the enjoyment of the reader. that one day thet'd stumble upon my work and feel even the slightest appreciation i, and so many others, had felt for them.

so, what am i planning now? i've confessed that i have material, but there are way too many. there are many things i write about, and i bet a few of your may feel pity for me that they're only fanfics, that i should spare my energy for more worthwhile activities. ORIGINALS, et cetera. but i feel like i'd burst if i don't write them sooner or later! besides, i still hold firm in my belief that practicing writing with fanfiction is admirable. they are merely a stepping stone. easier, because the characters are already there. once you are weened off fanfics, your practice on them will make you more experienced in writer's craft. i'd like to hope that my originals would benefit by taking up this hobby.

if any of my friends ever see this back up, they'd be wondering why i came back in such a manner, in my old digs no less. hell, some would probably wonder why i even left. i had feared inquiries to where i have been, and what i've been doing. it was difficult answer the ones i've encountered recently. it was difficult to say anything alarming to others, and embarrassing for myself.

... one must suppose i was hiding again, if they had known my ways and my doings, and coming back was to self-satisfy a need to gloat about some miseries i've encountered. i had thought of this. then! sometimes i wonder if acknowledging that i thought of the former is making me seem more innocent. i see that i'm running circles in this argument, but i've overlooked something important. i, just wanted to talk about... things. my life, and yes, my miseries. but also my happiness, my musings and my opinions included. i used to enjoy this, but i found myself over-indulging in bubbleheaded antics and blogging about the pettier things in my life. they're not curious, nor entertaining... just meaningless.